I’ve had this blog whirring round in my head for a couple of weeks and, after feeling inspired by a recent post from Love Audrey, I thought I’d add my own two pennies’ worth.
In the 11 years of running my business, there have been three occasions where life has forced everything to suddenly pause.
The first was in 2019, after a few years of ongoing health issues for John which eventually resulted in him needing an emergency pacemaker fitted.
We’d been away for the weekend in Cambridge. He collapsed on the Sunday, saw his consultant on the Monday evening and had the pacemaker fitted the following day. I took the Tuesday off work and was back at my desk on the Wednesday. Nothing was really affected.
The second time was in 2024 when my Mum suffered a brain aneurysm and was rushed into hospital. She spent five days there and thankfully made a full recovery, despite initially being given only a 33% chance.
At the same time, my Step Dad suffered two heart attacks and was admitted to a different hospital in the opposite direction to Mum. It felt relentless. I took a week away from work to support them both.
The third time was more recently, in March 2026, when my Step Dad suffered a massive stroke and passed away within 24 hours. It was unexpected and a huge shock to all of us.
After Nige died, I took two weeks off work. I was deep in grief, trying to support Mum, whilst also navigating the endless amount of “sadmin” that comes with losing someone.
Lessons I’ve learnt
It’s important to keep communications open – Despite being in complete shock, I emailed my clients on the Sunday evening explaining what was happening, what we expected the outcome to be, and that I would be offline for the rest of the week.
I also messaged my team of associates to ask whether they had capacity to step in where needed. Unsurprisingly, they all rallied round without hesitation. On the Monday evening, John sent a follow-up message to clients, one I had drafted earlier in the day, letting them know that Nige had passed away that afternoon.
Be realistic – In that second week, I told clients I would start to come back to work in the third week but was realistic in my expectations of what I could achieve. Concentration levels were low and I could only manage an hour at a time at my desk.
Have processes in place – I cannot stress enough how important it is to have things written down, especially when you have multiple clients to deal with. Having systems, notes, recordings and documented procedures in place meant my team could step in and support clients without too much disruption. When you work with multiple clients across different projects, that level of organisation becomes invaluable.
Whilst I’m incredibly grateful in many ways to be my own boss, this was one of the few times I wished I was employed. Part of me longed for the ability to simply be signed off for a few weeks to grieve quietly without worrying about work at all.
That said, building a team around Boatman Admin Services meant the business continued running whilst I stepped away. Combined with income from our other businesses, there was still money coming into the bank account at the end of the month, even when life had temporarily stopped.
That’s something I don’t think I fully appreciated until now.
Running a business gives you freedom in so many ways, but during periods of grief, it also forces you to confront how supported your business really is without you at the centre of everything.
For me, this experience highlighted the importance of building something sustainable, not just successful.
Returning to work whilst grieving felt strange. One minute I was answering emails and the next I was dealing with funeral arrangements. There wasn’t a clean separation between personal life and business life, and I think that’s something many business owners quietly experience.
Sometimes success isn’t about scaling faster or achieving more. Sometimes it’s simply about building a business that can hold steady whilst life happens around it.
